Je suis muette.

je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot.
je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot.
je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot.
je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot.
je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot.
je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot.
je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot. je suis idiot.
i feel like im liveing in "SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE" i cant be this way this way is not allowed uggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg...... the unknown mixed w/ knowns that are "uggg" anyway sucks......

knowing i dont know

Ick-
so im writing this now in hopes that no one will rat on me but yeah..
im living w/ my aunt and uncle and because of the job they must leave nest year ...my last year of high school... im so lost i know that " it will all work out" i get that but i hate not knowing i truly do , i fell asleep in the van on the way home from seeing where my uncles new job would be... i dreamt that i was sleeping in i guess "my" car in the school parking lot... i flipped when i woke up, but what if i have to do that some night what if i dont get of work till late and i cant go crash at someones house , will i be ok w/ that, am i ok w/ that.... i guess next year ill be "house less" cause i know i have a home i have lots but i dont expect homes doors to be open at just any time .... and what of school and food and a job....ugggggg..... i know "everything will work out" i just wish i knew for whos good....if any .... and how... i despise not knowing its a weakness to me and i loath being weak...but ill stop my rant about my loss of "knowing" and hope to do well in school and that i pass my drivers test....we only have about 10 weeks til the end of school breaks included.... uggg..... oh well

The Five Levels of Emo

First off before I even let you know the 5 levels note this....this is for my friends the people who are there no matter what level im at. The love me and care about me and i have trouble letting people know how i feel sometimes and this is a very short way to allow my friends to know wtf is up with me... they do not give me eyes full of pity..or of doubt..they do not call me names and check to make sure im "all right" and really just want to feel important...and i hate when people do ... i do not need or want your pity or your "sorrys" all i want is my friends love and a solution to my issues i have one of those things so im "good" so to say but here goes:

Level 1. Catatonic and self destructive( not necessarily physical)

Level 2. Shaky, self destructive(not necessarily physical), and quite

Level 3. Fidgety, worried, nervous

Level 4. Worried and slight fidgety-ness

Level 5. Almost complacent, typically filled with false hope.

X0X0X0X0X0X0X0X0X0X <3>

Thank you

So. i have State seech compation this weekend and i was given avery small amount of money for 3 days .... i had choir tonight and when i went in after we went throught hte songs oddly we prayed for me to be able to find cheap food and it mad eme feel realy bad cause i was soooo worried id end up haveing to barrow money and after the prayer this women who sits in the alto setion came up to me and old em to hold out my hand ...im used to people handing me trash this way so im lost and when i did she put a 20 in my hand and it made me feel realy secpial becuase this woman whom iv hardly realy talked to just gave that to me out of the goodness of her heart and it made me feel kinda low case iv been mad at the big guy latly and i think that was a smack.... but yeah that my rant and so if for some odd reson u read this and are like WTF...who ares about u..SCREW U.... im loved betch!