so scared... why cant i have a happy nailbunny?

i just sat there on my bed crying... i didnt know how to fix this stupid cut that i had created in the bond.. i was at a loss and so scared that i was going to loos her or that she wasnt going to love me any more... i know i over react but the issue is i dont know im over reacting till iv all ready fucked up ... i wish some one would give me an in depth report on how i annoy her... im so scared.. i have so much to learn and i seem to be learning the hard way. can i get a manual here? .. im trying to hold on to some one an learn about them.. and how to do this relationship all at once .. and the only mantra that seems to pop into my head is that of my former guardian " ur going to fuck up... you all ways fuck up" ... try being positive with that screaming through ur head every time u think uv even done the slightest thing wrong... it sucks ass... and i dnt want to be like that i dont want to think it but god damn im starting to feel like johnny here... i wish i could be near her.. i think my nerves would calm down if instead of me typing " i need a hug" i just put my arms around her... but hey.. love is patient... shes so beautiful and amazing i dont want to throw away my diamond cause i couldnt keep from shaking i was so scared of losing the gem...... ugg... i think ill find some prozac or something.. maey that will help... i love her... and i dont want to mess this up.